On that note, I feel inspired.

Two days have passed since I've started my Chapter for forever. Suprisingly…I figured out a bunch of stuff because of the conversation I had with the career confused kid. I shall name him Boomerang kid.

During my great conversation with Boomerang kid, we talked about music as an elder lady sitting next to us was staring and listening to our conversation. It was like she was obnoxiously there to remind us to be wise in our thoughts and interactions. (Anyways, observations aside…)every tip or question I would have for the kid would come right back to hit me in the face like a ton of bricks. It was like he had a super secret question deflector or something. Regardless, the kid made me realize the following 3 key points :

1. In his professionnal life, the musician is always haunted by the thought of being better. There is always something better waiting for him if he practices more, if he changes his technique, if he changes schools or teachers, etc. That effect seems to be mirrored in his personnal life (and when I say "his", I also mean "my"). Will I be happier if I change jobs? What if I change my location? Study more? Get a boyfriend/girlfriend?...

2. The winners are not always the best. Having won several songwriting competitions myself, I have a love-hate relationship with contests and their hierarchy. I would even say that they have de-educated me from what it means to be a true artist. I have to say that winning these competitions (in 2006 and 2008) opened a bunch of doors for me in terms of gigs and contacts…but at 17 and 19 years old, I sure as hell did not know how to use them, nor was my focus set on a artist oriented goal. I had to finish my god-darned bachelor's degree. Now that I have had time to grow as a person and as an artist, I realize that the runner-ups are the ones making a living out of their art (legit). While I was getting all the light back then, playing shows on the same 3 songs, they were the ones writing and composing. They were the ones getting more experience. They were the ones calling people up to play gigs. They were the ones getting better at their instrument and at their craft. I missed out on that. However, I take full responsability for not taking full care of my artist self because honestly, I was a kid and I did not know any better.

3. A true musician will need to find outlets to always be active on the artistic scene. Be it sound engineering, teaching, creating, composing or playing. Gigs are not always available. So, In order to survive, the musician will need plan C, plan D…all the way up to plan Z.

My epiphany? I have won at creating a cycle of doing nothing while wanting to get better.

It stops here.
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Back to me...

I believe I have officially decided to get back to teaching music in September (That would be my plan B : Point #3) While teaching, I will have musical projects with one of my buddies (You'll be able to read more about it as I keep writing this blog..)

In the meantime, I should go back to Montreal to live the rest of my urban life there. Get inspired (for real this time). Since I failed at being the best winner (Point #2), I'll win at getting my runner-up prize back : Perseverance.

And while I am in Montreal, I will take piano courses and practice different instruments (Point #1) in order to stay active artistically. (again, Point #3)

On that note, I feel inspired.